Donkey Kong Forum
General Donkey Kong Discussion => The Kong Off => Topic started by: marinomitch13 on June 25, 2013, 02:27:09 pm
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So, last year, leading up to the KO2, many of us challenged each (via twitch.tv chat) to other to little 'offs' that took place while at the KO2. Examples included:
Arm-Wrestling Off
Chipotle Burrito Off
Hot Wings Off (Not sure if this actually happened, though. It shoulda!!)
Bench Press Off
Giant Jenga Off
There may have been others, and the popularity of the ones we did do varied mostly based upon interest, but also, I think, partly due to not everyone knowing about them.
I just wanted to make a thread where we could organize some other fun 'offs' for while we are all together in Denver.
P.s. I would love to see Vincent and Hank come up with something good! Maybe they could go head to head on some game neither of them have ever played...
EDIT:
...oh yeah, and here is the link to the Chipotle Burrito Off between me and Hank, if anyone was wondering and hadn't seen it yet!: https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=4607625242426&set=vb.1646302531&type=3&theater (https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=4607625242426&set=vb.1646302531&type=3&theater)
It was super close!
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Did the chess off ever happen?
Looking forward to BO2 hehehe. I think I need an extra handicap this year... can I get chicken instead of beef? Beef is much harder for me to chew/swallow. After last years BO, I learned that the limiting factor is not my stomach (as I had anticipated) but rather the endurance of my masseters. So this year I will also be chewing gum in preparation. I'm also going to ask Vincent to slip some botox into your masseters while you're sleeping =).
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Oh, no, the chess off never happened... although, I remember Jeff W. and me starting a 'blind' chess game on someone's twitch chat that was going into some of the main lines of the Ruy Lopez!
Hehe...and, yeah, you can have chicken on you burrito this year. I take it this means we'll be at it again.
But just to make it official:
I, Mitchell Elliott, challenge Hank Chien to a Burrito Off at Chipotle, at the time of his choosing (so long as it is our meal, and you don't just pick to do it right after I've eaten a burger or something! ;D -I also just don't want you to end up doing this late at night and end up having a hard time sleeping before the KO3 or something like that). The challenge will consist of Mitchell having to eat two burritos in the time that it takes Hank to eat one. Both Burritos will be relatively plain (rice, pinto beans, meat, cheese, lettuce) and roughly the same in size, the only real difference being that Hank's can have chicken instead of steak (to compensate for his feeble jaw ;) )
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Haha... challenge accepted.
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I was thinking that for anyone arriving early for the KO3 we might take a trip to the states biggest arcade (manitou penny arcade). To help dispel this idea that we are just a bunch of jocks we would have a Walk-off. Just a short 1 mile walk and the fastest would win and no running allowed. A short stroll from the arcade is a pleasant little jaunt that fits the bill:
The Incline in 3 minutes Manitou Springs Colorado Springs (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mziPOrLo4v0#)
How high can you get?
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I was thinking that for anyone arriving early for the KO3 we might take a trip to the states biggest arcade (manitou penny arcade). To help dispel this idea that we are just a bunch of jocks we would have a Walk-off. Just a short 1 mile walk and the fastest would win and no running allowed. A short stroll from the arcade is a pleasant little jaunt that fits the bill:
[noembed]The Incline in 3 minutes Manitou Springs Colorado Springs (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mziPOrLo4v0#)[/noembed]
How high can you get?
I don't know, Jeff. My idea of a "pleasant little jaunt" would be a zip line excursion, preferably in the opposite direction. 8)
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A little tongue in cheek there. :P That hike kicks my butt, 2000 foot elevation gain in a mile. A zip line is about a mile away but it will be closed in November. The arcade is a must see, as it has games I've never seen elsewhere.
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If i'm able to make it out there a day or 2 early, which i'm assuming is when most of these mini-off's take place, I was wondering if...since Hank also holds the WR in Checkman, if anyone would want to have a mini Checkman-Off.
I've seen a few others try this game out on streams, its a fun/quick game so it wouldn't take that long (even a very good game only lasts under 10 minutes)...just throwing the idea out there...another small event anyone interested could participate in.
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Just wanted to update Hank on my training for our Burrito-Off.
During the last 4 days, I have had 11 Chipotle burritos:
Day 1: 3 at a time for dinner.
Day 2: Took the day off from training.
Day 3: 3 at a time for dinner.
Day 4: 5 in one day! (3 of them at a time for lunch, then two others at one time for dinner).
I'm ready. Are you!? ;)
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If Mark and I don't do this soon we will have to do out Turtle Off or Stratovox Off in Denver
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Day 4: 5 in one day! (3 of them at a time for lunch, then two others at one time for dinner).
Holy cow! I'm falling behind.
I'm gonna stop by Costco on my way home and get a family size pack of Wrigley's.
BTW did you see Joey Chestnut on the 4th of July?! He broke his record-- 69 hot dogs in 10 minutes. Beast!
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if anyone would want to have a mini Checkman-Off.
Can I participate? To make it fair, I can play "cold", but I can still usually get 100-200K cold.
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hey Mitch why dont you challenge Hank to a real burritto?
Jack-n-Grill 7lb Burrito Challange (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qviGMgYagtQ#ws)
that 7lb monster is only about 2 miles away from the 1-up in denver. Plus if a woman finishes it she eats at the resturant for free for LIFE
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I haven't seen a response from kyou, saying whether or not he's willing to go up against me in the Debate-Off, but I am ready if he or anyone else is. Is ready to lose the mame/home score vs live arcade score argument, that is. 8)
Also Robbie, we may be able to have our first Swear-Off at the Kong-Off 3. Jourdan Adler himself may be our third contender for the coveted "SwearOff spittoon." (I just made that up) Seriously, Jourdan expressed interest. He may just curse at a centipede machine while we play games that we dislike. I figured it comes to the same thing. We'd just need to figure out who our panel of distinguished judges will be.
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Whoa! I had seen this episode before, but I didn't remember that it was in Denver! To be honest, I'm a pretty picky eater (I don't like tomatoes, onions, and peppers :/ ), but if they could make one with only stuff in it that I like, I may be able to do it! I've eaten 3 Chipotle burritos in 11 minutes before and 4 in 30, so maybe I'd have a shot! Each normal-sized Chipotle is about 1.5 lbs, and I usually get at least 2 every time I go, and they are with extra rice and beans -so I'm guessing they are each just under 2 lbs.
You know what, if people want me to, I'd be willing to try it on one of the days!
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George, what was your specific position on the issue of the MAME/Arcade scores? Would it be a Debate-Off about what scores ought to count for the KOs, or would it be about something a little different?
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I agree George about the Swear Off. Denver would be a great place to host such an exciting event. Jourdan can play Centipede, you can play Popeye, and I will stick to Donkey Kong since I swear on that game anyways. Our panel of judges will obviously include Allen the king of creative swears providing a judgment on creativity, and a couple other judges rating our Swear Off based on volume and form. It will be so big it will even take focus off the Wild Card Division.
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I think George should play Jr. That will bring out the best (swear words) in him.
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Depends on what the debate is I'm game. :)
My entire "debate" was why MAME for DK (and just DK here) is not worthy of being considered for this event and a score on a home cab. That's all lets do it :D
Dan
I haven't seen a response from kyou, saying whether or not he's willing to go up against me in the Debate-Off, but I am ready if he or anyone else is. Is ready to lose the mame/home score vs live arcade score argument, that is. 8)
Also Robbie, we may be able to have our first Swear-Off at the Kong-Off 3. Jourdan Adler himself may be our third contender for the coveted "SwearOff spittoon." (I just made that up) Seriously, Jourdan expressed interest. He may just curse at a centipede machine while we play games that we dislike. I figured it comes to the same thing. We'd just need to figure out who our panel of distinguished judges will be.
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I think George should play Jr. That will bring out the best (swear words) in him.
If that is the case I will take the Popeye machine as that will help reach my full swearing potential.
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Mitch and Dan, I was thinking more of a debate on the general subject of mame and home scores vs live arcade scores. What scores should be accepted to earn an invitation to the kong off would naturally arise under this broader subject of debate. You guys and anyone else are welcome to take the opposing view to me. I have a feeling I will probably have more people on my team, but even if it is just me alone, I feel comfortable and confident that I can take you all on myself. 8)
There is also the question of a moderator. It must be someone both sides agree on, a neutral party. Lets not be quick to nominate anyone, but see how things go in the next few weeks. The right moderator/moderators may present themselves.
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I nominate either Chris Psaros or Walter Day! ;D
Seriously.
EDIT: I trust either would be good, even if they did have their own strong opinions on the matter. But, I know I can't really force them to do something they don't wanna. At the very least, I'm complimenting their intellectual honesty and level-headedness.
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I like Hank's suggestion. So I think the picture of the SwearOff is getting clearer. I think I will play stupid junior, Robbie plays Popeye and Jourdan will play centipede. Also we will all play DK. That way we each have a unique title to curse at, and also a second round where we all curse at the same game. Of course this is still the early stages, but I'm kind of liking how the format is starting to take shape.
And very good point, Allen Staal is a natural choice for head judge. He really couldn't compete, he's too good. So another 2-4 judges should do it I think.
Also there is a possibility of more contenders. I imagine Ross may be inspired to throw his asshat into the ring.
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Let's not be quick to nominate anyone I said! ;D
No way would I agree to Chris P as a moderator. And not because of his endless opinions on every little bit of minutiae under the sun as it pertains to DK which I often find tedious, ponderous and wrong, but clearly he is not fond of me. For some reason, I can't imagine why.
And I would disagree with Walter as a choice as well. He is above this. He is a high meditator, not a mediator or moderator. I wouldn't want to drag him into this debate-off. Even as an aloof and impartial judge, that's still many levels down from where he is. Plus I don't want anything getting in the way of our music making.
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Lol, fair enough. It has to be someone everyone (or each 'side') can agree on. Maybe Joel West? Maybe Hank? Maybe just a random bartender!? :P
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No way would I agree to Chris P as a moderator. And not because of his endless opinions on every little bit of minutiae under the sun as it pertains to DK which I often find tedious, ponderous and wrong, but clearly he is not fond of me. For some reason, I can't imagine why.
Excuse me?
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I agree George about the Swear Off. ... you can play Popeye, ...
Popeye doesn't suit George well anyway. I heard a rumor that he can get 300K on it. Or was it 3M? I can't remember how many zeroes there were. Someone saw it on the wall of fame at Funspot.
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Yeah, that was just a lucky game though, Hank. A very lucky game. I think it was because I helped carry the Popeye machine that Ben set the world record on up the stairs of his apartment in Brooklyn. I earned some Popeye spinach powers from that.
Excuse me?
You heard me, blog-boy!
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I prefer debates done with MAME. Should I use WolfMAME 106 and attach the INP to this thread, or do I need to stream it and send a copy to the KO3?
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Lol, fair enough. It has to be someone everyone (or each 'side') can agree on. Maybe Joel West? Maybe Hank? Maybe just a random bartender!? :P
Joel may be biased towards the live arcade side of the debate. Most of the guys from the 80s scene are. He may make an effort to take an impartial view on the subject, but I think I know where his heart lays. I think you would be giving me an unfair advantage. Although Joel knows I worship Satan, so that may color his judgement of me a tiny bit. I guess I'm saying Joel may have strong opinions that would get in the way of being a moderator.
I wouldn't want to put Hank in that position. As Ambassador of Donkey Kong, Hank needs to stay out of controversy. It wouldn't do for his true feelings to come out about this subject. All the mame players would cry. :'(
And Mitch, Do you drink beer? I am pretty sure you don't. I think that may be why you don't know this, but I'll let you in on a little secret: there is no such thing as a random bartender. :)
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I prefer debates done with MAME. Should I use WolfMAME 106 and attach the INP to this thread, or do I need to stream it and send a copy to the KO3?
You could submit it to marp.
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I would also nominate Ross as a participant for the Swear-Off as he would be a potential contender. I saw Allen's swearing skills live at the KO2 and it would be unfair for him to just blow us out of the water. He should be a judge.
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And Mitch, Do you drink beer? I am pretty sure you don't. I think that may be why you don't know this, but I'll let you in on a little secret: there is no such thing as a random bartender. :)
You're correct, I don't drink beer. Just my personal preference. Think of it as a judgment call to keep myself out of jail. I don't think it would be a good idea for me to ever get drunk! ;D
Ah, no such thing as a 'random bartender'? What, do they have moods? ;) hehe
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if anyone would want to have a mini Checkman-Off.
Can I participate? To make it fair, I can play "cold", but I can still usually get 100-200K cold.
Yea of course. 150-200k is about what i seemed to average when I was playing. I havent played in a while...game on = )
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Check-Man? I think i saw vince play that one night. I'll give it a try :D
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Yea I tried for a few weeks to beat Hank's WR but came up just short. I think i'd have the #2 spot if I submitted my score.
Use the slider buttons, and use the ability to move through the outer walls to your advantage.
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I imagine Ross may be inspired to throw his asshat into the ring.
I would also nominate Ross as a participant for the Swear-Off as he would be a potential contender.
Haha please! You retard-fucking shit-molesters couldn't get within a giraffe dick of my skillz.
Actually, I'd much prefer to judge the contest. If I was selected as a judge, I would grade based upon the following three criteria: creativity, vulgarity, and venom.
For example, I would award creativity points for use of the term "cock-snorkel",...
venom points if a contestant threatened a game's antagonist, "You'd better bring a cock-snorkel you fucking monkey because I'm going to hold you under water until you learn to breath through your dick!"
and vulgarity points for completely over the top and disgusting commentary, "Then, just as you're learning to breath through your dick, I'm going to shit down the snorkel, into your dong, and fill your bladder with feces until it ruptures! Fuck you!"
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Yeah, on second thought, Ross better be a judge.
It was suggested to me that Ben Falls would be a good judge for the swear-off as well. Neither me nor Robbie or Jourdan made it to his funniest arcade players list, so we know he doesn't have a bias towards any of us.
So if Ben is willing to accept the responsibility, and the other contenders approve, we'll have three judges and three contenders so far. The swear-off is really starting to come together now. Son of a fuck, I'd better start practicing. Piece of fuck. Shitsack Perlman. See, I have a lot of work to do.
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Oddly enough, this seems like an appropriate time and place for a movie recommendation.
Ross, if you haven't yet seen "The Aristocrats", I suspect you would thoroughly enjoy it.
EDIT: Robbie and George, you might also wish to screen the above title, as an inspirational training film of sorts.
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It's dangerous to go alone! Take this.
http://ptos.moderntoss.com/ (http://ptos.moderntoss.com/)
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Not competition related, but two side quests I would like to complete in Denver include: visiting the 2-up, and trying the "Total Carnage" wings from the 1-up.
Anyone interested, let me know. Those wings are going to hurt and I'd rather not have to eat all 10 myself.
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Yeah I would like to hit the 2-up as well. I like hot wings are these HOT wings or just Hot wings. :)
Dan
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Ross, I'll do the wings with you!
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I say we have an award for best dressed. It may be time for me to dust off my cream turtleneck and corduroy vest.
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I had a burger with Total Carnage last year. I was crying-- not for the light-hearted. The wings without Total Carnage were not so hot.
Mitch when do you want to do the Burrito Off? Thursday dinner OK? I need a day for my stomach to settle down. Last year my stomach didn't feel right the next day.
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Feed me Total Carnage. I want it. I'd also be interested in checking out the 2UP.
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I would like to join whoever is going to Chipotle.
As for the wings, no! I don't eat hot.
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Mitch when do you want to do the Burrito Off? Thursday dinner OK? I need a day for my stomach to settle down. Last year my stomach didn't feel right the next day.
Thursday sounds good to me!
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I have one, how about a Sound-Off. We can record particpants shooting a wrestling style promo before the contest and then judge who cut the best one. We should also stage a confrontation where two people "brawl". (though it could attract unwanted attention). It sounds like of lame, but so what.